Mills & Boon at Morley Lit Fest

As a lover of all things ridiculous and romantic, one event I’ve been looking forward to for a while is the celebration of Mills & Boon, one of the events on the Morley Lit Fest calendar, this Saturday from 7.30.
Taking place in a 1950s themed diner, this event promises to be packed with laughs as well as sighs of longing, with readings, romantic crooning and spoken word artists.
I myself will be giving a short introduction to the history of the hero (just an excuse to have massive blown up pictures of Kevin Sorbo really…) and reading during the event.
This event is also be the launch of a very exciting project, the collaboratively written ‘Broken Shackles’, a Leeds-based romance novel staring our heroine Victoria Quartermain and the sizzling hero Nate Rothwell.
This book belongs in the raunchier end of the Romance genre, and is guaranteed to get your blood throbbing (had to use the word throbbing somewhere).

Tickets can be bought online or by ringing the Grand Theatre Box Office. At only £6 in, this is a real bargain for a great, romantic, book-themed night out.

Cuts are bad, Mkay

Full disclosure; I'm middle class. Horribly middle class. And I vote. And I'm young (ish) and I have a regular, if petite, income. If I'd only do the decent thing and breed I'd be a politicians wet dream.
When the campaign against library closures started late last year, I threw my energy behind it enthusiastically, I'll admit. The reasons for this are two-fold. Firstly, I'm a librarian (or will be once I can find three and a half grand so can actually qualify). I'd quite like a job in ten years. Does this make me selfish? Probably, but if I was a social worker, or worked for a charity, or was a nurse I'm pretty sure I'd also like to be in work. It's just cos I'm a librarian, you know, that middle class profession for bored ladies who don't have anything better to do, that I'm seen as selfish for wanting to campaign out of self-interest.
I also love libraries. When I was a teenager the library in Scarborough Town Centre was the only place I could go to work where I had space, and quiet. I know what libraries do for people, but there are so many examples of this online (go on Voices for the Library-another blog full of selfish librarians who would also like a job in ten years) for some.
So yes, I've campaigned against library closure, in a tiny tiny way. I've promoted them on here, on the Guardian Leeds Blog, I've got every person I've ever met since I was five to sign the e-petition that the WI (another load of bored middle class ladies looking out for their self-interests) set up. This is fuck all compared to some, but I'm proud of what I did, and hoped in a small way that it got libraries talked about on the public agenda.
And now I'm told that I'm a mentalist lefty who is personally responsible for cuts to social services and health care. Because I didn't get Phillip Pullman to talk about that. Because I'm middle class, and therefore a secret Tory who doesn't give a shit about anybody else but myself and my precious little library. Because I would rather have children reading than eating. Clearly.
I'm sorry, but that's bollocks, and massively insulting. It is possible to be angry about more than one thing. No I'm not personally involved with a save social care campaign, but that doesn't mean I wouldn't support one. I am angry about all the cuts to public services, it isn't fair to say that because I've written about the cuts I know about I'm responsible for others.
I'm not an investigative journalist; I'm an apprentice librarian with a book blog. I do follow many bloggers and campaigners that campaign for several issues and I always offer support to them when appropriate. If I've ever come across as putting my interests above other's I'm sorry.
As I said in the piece for the Guardian Leeds, "[This campaign] may have sidelined other incredibly important issues that have come about from the failure of successive governments to tackle the inequalities that result from the current economic systems, and legislation surrounding the distribution of wealth." And I still believe that is true.
Being told that, by virtue of my being middle class and behaving in the way that us posho lefties do I'm personally responsible for turning the entire battle against the cuts into a 'them and us' issue really hurts. I don't like being thought of as 'them', as I inevitably am being.
So what can I do? Stop campaigning altogether, just in case I offend someone, or come across as thinking that 'my' issue should sideline others? Or work harder, got to more meetings and speak to more people to try and join campaigns up, or at least learn more about how others are suffering and reassess my privilege accordingly.
I'm not sorry I campaigned for the libraries, but I am sorry if I've ever done anything to prevent other campaigns being successful. I'm not a "well heeled worthy", or at least I don't mean to be.

Sorry again.
Jess

Own opinion, not representing views of others etc etc. 

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Libraries Table of Contents

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Full Table of Contents 

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

 Stanford Report, June 14, 2005.

This is the prepared text of the Commencement address delivered by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computers and of Pixar Animation Studios, on June 12 2005.

Illustration created by 19 year old technician
Jonathan Mak Long.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college. Truth be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life. That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption. She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates, so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated from college and that my father had never graduated from high school. She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a few months later when my parents promised that I would someday go to college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on.

Let me give you one example: Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space between different letter combinations, about what makes great typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life. But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And since Windows just copied the Mac, it's likely that no personal computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope it's the closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a useful but purely intellectual concept: No one wants to die.

Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish." It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.
Thank you all very much.

Steve Jobs
Co-founder of Apple
Chief Executive Pixar Animated Studios
24th February 1955 - 5th October 2011

Podcast Interview with Lucinda Hawksley!!!

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Lucinda Hawksley - travel author, art historian and tweeter - was kind enough to have a bit of a chat with me for your listening pleasure!

As I've just finished Lizzie Siddal - the tragedy of a Pre-Raphaelite Supermodel, we had a good natter about that. We also chatted about travel writing, the Pre-Raphaelite artists and Charles Dickens - Lucinda's great great great grandfather.  

Every now and again, we were randomly attacked by some white noise, but I've hopefully managed to edit that out of the recording! 

***LANGUAGE WARNING ***

- We're actually very restrained. We barely swear at all!!

Want to find out more? Check out Luncinda's website here.

Or send her a tweet @LucindaHawksley

P.S. The name of the Oxford set was the Inklings!

Mobile Podcast Interview

Lucinda Hawksley

Canongate Book 4 - And we'll all go together....

Next up on the LeedsBookClub Canongate challenge was The Helmet of Horror by Victor Pelevin.

Victor Pelevin is a Russian author, famed for his work in the SF genera; so I approached this book with very high hopes. I was also very curious as I've heard that his style is to use multi-layered
philosophical techniques, designed to encourage the reader to create their own fiction, heroes and universe out of his words.

On the other hand; somewhat dampening my enthusiasm; the Minotaur and Labyrinth myth was one I LOATHED when I first encountered it, primarily due to it's (to my mind) unnecessarily tragic conclusion.

Background to the Myth - Theseus and the Minotaur

(I'm going to try to nut shell this origin story in particular.
Binu focused on a particular time frame of the original myth, the Penelopiad followed the myth into the underworld and Girl meets Boys related the myth in its entirety. This book seemed to borrow certain motifs from the original myth - most obviously the minotaur and the labyrinth - without aligning the plot in any way with the storyline.)

King Minos and his wife had many children. The eldest - Androgeus - grew into a particularly talented and skilled athlete. More than that, he was intelligent, resourceful and charismatic. One year, he decided to travel to Athens and compete in the Pan-Athenian games, held only one year in five. 
Androgeus dominated every sport that he participated in. He won not only every title but also the hearts and minds of the viewing crowds. Every one in fact, except the other competitors, who became so enraged that they assassinated him. 

The King promptly gathered his fleet, set sail for Athens and demanded that the city hand over the murderers or dire consequences etc etc. Not knowing exactly who had preformed the dastardly deed, King Aegeus instead surrendered the entire town. King Minos considered for some time and set his conditions. Every Great Year (that's seven for the uninitiated) the seven bravest youths and most beautiful maidens were to be sent to Crete...never to be seen again.

Henri Matisse

It transpired that somewhere down the genetic line, the King and Queen had a rather unusual child. A human from the neck down, the child had the head of a bullock and was known as the Minotaur. He was sent by his parents to live in the Labyrinth. The 14 Athenians were dumped into the labyrinth, presumably to satiate his monstrous appetite (which now I think of it is considerably creepier than when I was ten...) 

After three cycles, the prince of Athens - Theseus - decided that enough was enough. He would go as part of the sacrificial youths and slay the beast. He promised his father that if he succeeded, he would fly white sails - so that his father would instantly know that he was returning. 
I think it's fair to say, Theseus would probably not have succeeded if he hadn't had the luck to charm the Princess Ariadne. Presumably she wasn't too well up on her own family tree as she aided Theseus in freeing the 13 other youngsters and killing her brother - the Minotaur - utterly betraying her father and mother. 

She then fled with Theseus to Crete with her younger sister. 
Actually, she didn't. Thesesus dumped her on the island of Naxos and she cursed her former lover. As a result he forgot to change the sails of his boat from black to white and his father - believing the worst - threw himself off a cliff in despair at having lost his son. 
Theseus returned home, victorious but devastated.   

*****

The Review 

*****SPOILERS-ISH***

*****SPOILERS-ISH***

*****SPOILERS-ISH***

 

What a weird book. 

Ok. Part of me thinks that this is one of the best stories I've ever read (barring the ending). Another part of me is still bogged down in the myriad of possible explanations - desperately trying to work out what the hell was going on. A third part thinks that while it was a noble effort, Pelevin just don't quite hit the nail on the head.

Very much in the here and now; the book is set in cyberspace. Correction - it is set in a closed corner of the cyber world. One little conversation thread in fact. 

Eight characters wake up one morning (or do they?) and find themselves in a small room (or are they?) - with only a computer for company (or...you get it right?). They are unable to contact the outside world, only able to commune with one another. Through dreams, exploration of the available outside world - which seems to consist of a giant labyrinthine complex and a sweet/horrid love affair we discover more about the characters and their lives, opinions and philosophies.

The solutions offered depend very much on their personality of the one proposing it; which in turn seems to be influenced by the name they are allocated. For UGLI666 - seeningly a religious fundamental throwback - every thing is dripping in sin. Romeo and Isolde - influenced no doubt by their tragic romantic name inspirations - every event reinforeces the possibility of a romantic or physical connection.

So far, so awesome. But then...I don't know. It just doesn't work. Every time it looks like we're getting somewhere, Pelevin runs off on a comedic tangent - which is actually quite amusing, but ultimately frustrating. While I liked the idea of the Minotaur's head being a virtual reality headset - and it was discussed in some detail - the explanation was either adopted or dropped entirely by the second half of the book - I just couldn't tell which. I really enjoyed the interchanges between the characters; but due to the linear nature, I'm not sure I actually engaged with them the way I was supposed to.

For all of the philosophising; it feels like the author is afraid to commit - the sheer number of possibilities renders the labyrinth meaningless. Without one fixed point to work from or on, the story descends into surreality.  


I'll definately read more of Pelevin's work in the future. Hopefully this was a forey in a new direction and that his previuos works feel less artificially light and comedic; offering a read with more bite.  

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Canongate

Book 08 - Weight - Jeanette Winterson
Book 07 - Ragnarok - AS Byatt
Book 06 - Where Three Roads Meet
Book 05 - Dream Angus - Alexander McCall-Smith

Book 04 - The Helmet of Horror - Victor Pelevin

Book 03 - Binu and the Great Wall - Su Tong

Book 02 - Girl Meets Boy - Ali Smith

Book 01 - The Penelopiad - Margaret Atwood

Book List

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Ongoing Challenges - Table of Contents

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Full Table of Contents